I think that two of the people with the best way of looking at things are DJ and Am. DJ always has this whole positive outlook and happiness that just rubs off on you and makes you positive and happy. Seriously. Who, in this entire world, would not love DJ? Nobody. And Am, well he's a tree. And trees are old and wise. It's like when he re entered the cycle of life, he chose to be a human because he thought it would be fun, but he shouldn't have, because he's way past humanity. He should have been a sloath, or a tree. He shouldn't be bothered with this pathetic running around just to get food and water and entertainment. He should just sit there and concentrate on living, and let the water and the sun come to him, like trees do. And trees know everything.

Whenever I'm tripping he reminds me of a tree as well.

Ryan is currently asleep on my floor. It's quater to twelve, mid day. I wish he'd wake up, I want to watch a film, but not by myself. He just fell asleep last night. Got back to my house got the blankets and crashed out on the floor.

Grr why do Americans just not understand the British education system, you say college, they think you mean university. I should have learned that explaining to them is just not worth the effort.

I want to watch a film.

I want to read crappy books.

I kind of want to go back to sleep.

I want a zoot. Ryan wants a zoot (he's awake now) I think we're gonna go out and have a zoot. Excellent.

Saw Caroline yesterday, it was good. There was kissing and cuddling, not much talking though. Conversation is just not really a factor anymore. It really ought to be. It's just that I'm happy enough listening to her converse with other people, and don't know what to say myself. Ah I don't know, I'm scared, a little bit. I mean, we have to break up at some point, I have to go to university, a year before her.

In fact, I swear to God, out of all of my friends, I'm the only fucking one who will end up going next year. I mean lots of them are a year younger than me, and the ones in the same year just aren't really university people... Ryan... Sam... Harry... It's a bit shit. I could put it back a year. But I want to get away far far away. A part of me does, but a part of me wants to stay. I guess I should go, I'll make new friends if I go. But what about the ones I have to leave? I'll have to leave them anyway. But so soon after findig them?

I want to get away. I do I do. I do. I reckon I'm gonna go to university somewhere like exeter. I wonder if they'd visit me there. I don't think they would though. I reckon they all would once. And I'd come back and visit them. I guess I'd come to rely on my phone a bit more.

Agh. I don't like phones.

ARGH. WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON WITH MY FUCKING LIFE!?!?!?!? THE STRESS THE STRESS!

Okay, outburst over. Have a nice day everyone.